Serves 4

Rant #1

There should be certain rules when you open your mouth to speak.
If you are under 25, never had a baby and/or are under 120lbs then the words "I am getting so fat" should never come out of your mouth. Neither should you feel obligied to tell people how you are going to raise your children with the obvious implication that whatever they are doing is wrong.

Rant #2

Never underestimate the power of a person to delude themself. I do understand that maybe its easier to accept that you are something you aren't in your own head but don't subject the rest of us to your fantasy world. Is it really necessary to tell everyone you are a size 6 when it is obvious that you are a 14? And if you are going to eat a dessert that serve 4 please accept that Kelly Ripa will never be your girlfriend...